AhlulBayt (AS) International News Agency – ABNA: "When the war broke out, I sent my sons to the trenches; but when they returned, there was no home left for them." These words are whispered these days in the alleyways of countless cities across Iran. Today's Iran is entangled in an all-out economic and military war—a war that targets homes not only with bullets but also with sanctions, inflation, and skyrocketing prices. In such circumstances, one of the first casualties of this war is the institution of the family, and more critically, the very possibility of starting one. Statistics indicate that the 36 percent surge in inflation in recent years has had a direct impact on the decline or postponement of marriage. Nevertheless, the youth of this land, amid the difficult days of the recent imposed war, registered over 29,000 marriages. This figure carries a clear and resolute message: life, even under the harshest conditions, prevails over death. But this victory demands a fundamental redefinition of the concept of marriage and the abandonment of many costly customs. In this article, drawing on Quranic verses, prophetic tradition (Sunnah), and practical solutions, we seek to answer the question of how, in the midst of war and soaring prices, one can build a bridge from tradition to simplicity and begin a shared life.
Crisis: sanctions, inflation, and the enigma of marriage
Economic sanctions, though ostensibly instruments of political pressure, in reality target the daily lives of ordinary people. The impact of sanctions on the welfare of Iranian households can be clearly observed in runaway inflation. Rising housing prices, exorbitant wedding costs, and declining purchasing power have left many young people anxious about the future. On the other hand, sanctions have led to the closure of production units and have driven unemployment higher, particularly among the youth. A young person today, confronted with the risk of unemployment, the lack of housing, and limited financial means, views marriage as a high-risk decision. Marriage loans, too, have effectively lost their utility due to inflation and lengthy waiting lists.
Nevertheless, the experience of the COVID-19 era demonstrated that economic problems are not the sole reason for the decline in marriage; rather, ostentatious customs and cumbersome traditions play a major role in this crisis. The pandemic, by forcibly eliminating many formalities, led to a rise in marriage rates for the first time in years. This experience stands as clear evidence that if we set aside the more costly customs, the path to marriage will become considerably smoother.
The divine promise: do not fear poverty; marry
The Holy Quran, this guiding celestial book, delivers its most hopeful message in the most critical of circumstances. In Verse 32 of Surah An-Nur, it states:
"And marry the unmarried among you and the righteous among your male slaves and female slaves. If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty. And Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing." (Surah An-Nur, Verse 32)
This verse is a clear and unequivocal command: do not regard poverty as an obstacle to marriage. Commentators hold that this verse teaches people to think of marrying others off and to strive, to the best of their ability, to help the unmarried enter into marriage. On the other hand, God has promised that He Himself will enrich the needy from His bounty. Some exegetes believe that marriage itself is a cause of sufficiency and the fulfilment of material needs.
This meaning is also emphasized in prophetic traditions (hadith). The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Whoever refrains from marriage out of fear of poverty has thought ill of God." Imam Reza (AS) also said: "Make marriage easy so that people may flee from sin." The Prophet (PBUH) elsewhere introduced the best marriages as the easiest ones. These teachings form the intellectual pillars of "easy marriage"—an approach that emphasizes reducing excessive formalities, focusing on moral compatibility rather than financial means, and facilitating the process of beginning a shared life.
Getting to know traditions: which to keep and which to set aside?
Iranian traditions are a precious heritage of this land's culture and refinement. The custom of formal courtship (khastegari), respect for elders, communal celebration and joy, and seeking blessings from the elderly—all are rooted in our identity. But over time, many of these traditions have been inverted from essence to form, becoming tools for showing off and displaying financial power rather than symbols of affection and union.
Traditions that can and should be preserved:
· Simple courtship ceremonies: instead of lavish halls and luxury flower baskets, this respected custom can be honoured in the home of elders, with simple tea and sweets.
· Family-based engagement and wedding celebrations: instead of expensive halls and multi-day events, a simple gathering can be held at home or in a mosque, sharing joy with the closest relatives.
· Symbolic gifts and dowries: instead of insisting on heavy dowries and luxury goods, one can emphasize simple, practical gifts and cultivate a spirit of contentment over extravagance.
Traditions that should be abandoned or moderated:
· Expensive wedding halls: the cost of venues and lavish receptions is one of the greatest obstacles to marriage. Eliminating them or replacing them with home-based celebrations drastically reduces expenses.
· Heavy dowries and unconventional bride-wealth (mahriyyah): these customs place a heavy burden on the groom and his family, delaying many marriages.
· Repetitive and costly ceremonies: events such as pre-wedding parties, henna nights, and the like, if not kept simple, generate additional expenses.
· Unnecessary decorations and aristocratic floral arrangements: by choosing seasonal flowers and eliminating extra adornments, costs can be significantly reduced.
The COVID-19 experience demonstrated that removing excessive formalities does not diminish the value of marriage but rather facilitates it and increases its frequency.
Practical solutions for marriage in difficult conditions
1. Shifting mindsets: from economic perfectionism to contentment
Many young people, influenced by media and social comparisons, set standards for starting a life that take years to achieve. Economic perfectionism is one of the primary obstacles to marriage. It must be accepted that married life can begin with the bare minimum, and that happiness is not confined to material possessions.
2. Prioritizing expenditures
Instead of spending on a one-night ceremony, it is better to direct limited budgets toward securing housing or essential household items. Experts recommend holding the engagement and wedding ceremonies together to reduce additional costs.
3. Making proper use of available facilities
Although marriage loans have partly lost their effectiveness due to inflation, they can still cover some initial expenses. Proper management of these facilities and avoiding heavy debt are essential.
4. Cooperation among families
Families play a key role in facilitating marriage. Helping to secure housing, providing a simple dowry, and offering emotional support to young couples can alleviate the heavy economic burden. Religious teachings also emphasize cooperation in the matter of marriage.
5. Marriage without formalities: a successful model
Many young couples in recent years have opted for simple ceremonies that have not diminished the value of their lives but have instead given them greater peace of mind and focus for building their future. "Easy marriage" does not mean treating marriage lightly; rather, it means leniency in formalities and taking the essence of the union seriously.
A look at the statistics: marriage in days of war
In the difficult days of the recent imposed war, despite all the pressures and insecurity, over 29,711 marriages were registered across the country. The Vice President for Women and Family Affairs described this act as "the most beautiful form of popular resistance." This statistic stands as evidence that the will to live is stronger than bullets and sanctions. The youth of this land have proven that even in the heart of crisis, one can hope for the future and take the first step toward building a family.
Conclusion
Marriage is the sturdiest foundation of social life. The Quran has accompanied this sacred edifice with the promise of divine sufficiency, and the Prophet (PBUH) and the AhlulBayt (AS) have strongly emphasized making it easy. In times of war and sanctions, when the enemy has targeted our homes and our tables, simple living and the abandonment of excessive formalities are not a choice but a necessity. The fine Iranian traditions can be honoured with simplicity; the custom of respecting elders, communal celebration, and the blessings of the elderly do not require aristocratic halls or hundred-piece dowries.
Today's youth, inspired by the verses of the Quran and the conduct of the Infallibles (AS), can build a bridge from costly traditions to meaningful simplicity—a bridge that, on one side, preserves Iranian-Islamic identity and authenticity, and on the other, opens the path to beginning a life even in the most difficult economic circumstances. Just as God has promised: "If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty." This divine promise remains steadfast amid sanctions and inflation—provided that we too abandon extravagance and place our faith in the essence of the union.
Author: Fatemeh Poorabbas
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